How to make group texting suck less for you and the whole group

Group texts don't need to be torturous.
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How to make group texting suck less for you and the whole group
Too. Many. Group. Texts. Send help! Credit: Getty Images/Blend Images

Most would agree that group texts are the absolute worst.

They take up more time than you ever anticipated, reading through all of your messages is a chore, and they seem to never end. Like, never end.

It's also sadly inevitable that the day will come when you're forced into a group text, probably one full of many people. But there's a way to make it more bearable — and to become a better group texter as well. (Odds are, you're not always on your best behavior, either.)

In an attempt to make the group texting experience more bearable, we've put together a list of tactics and things to consider when messaging multiple people simultaneously.

Read on to group text better.

Think about who you're texting

Whether you're in a group text with your parents, friends, schoolmates, or work friends, consider what you're sharing — and who you're sharing it with.

Parents may not be interested in the latest memes and explaining their nuances can be a pain. If you're in a school or work-related thread, avoid sending crass or "edgy" messages.

It's common sense: Just consider what you're sending before you do so. You don't want to confuse people or make them uncomfortable. If anything that will just result in more texts — and honestly, who needs that?

Be mindful of people's schedules

While not everyone's schedules are the same, most people are busy during typical work week hours, so sending a million mid-day texts isn't always ideal.

Some people rise early or get to bed early (for instance, people with kids, or who have unusually early work days). Avoid including them on a text that you know will solicit a bunch of responses super late at night or early in the morning.

Don't be afraid to mute the conversation

If you're a part of a group texting thread that never ceases to quiet down no matter how often you plead for less texting, feel free to mute the conversation or set the chat to "Do Not Disturb."

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You may be concerned that muting the conversation will make you seem rude or absent from important conversations, but if something is really important, someone will alert you.

Otherwise, you'll be able to check in at your leisure without receiving notification after notification. It's a group texting dream.

Name the group!

If you have the ability to name the group texting or messaging thread you're on — this is possible on an iPhone or when using Facebook Messenger — I strongly recommend you do so.

It may seem like a frivolous move, and not everyone will love the name you choose, but naming your group thread will help you keep track of all your ongoing conversations. It can prove especially helpful if you happen to be in other texting threads with some of the same people.

Plus, the people in your chat will likely appreciate this, as they'll reap the same rewards as you.

Don't write lots of one-word texts

Please, if you must text in the group thread, don't deliver multiple short answers in a row. Everyone will despise you.

If you have something pressing to share or say, try to sum it up in one brief text. If you have a lot to say, maybe try writing an email. Or, give someone a call. And, while we're at it, try to be judicious with your group texts in general.

If you have an iPhone, utilize iMessage reactions

This doesn't apply to all, but if you have an iPhone and most of the people you're chatting with do as well, using iMessage reactions can be extremely useful.

Just hold your finger down on a text, and you'll have the option to react with a heart, thumbs up, thumbs down, "Ha ha," exclamation, or question mark reaction. Doing this can cut down on texts that glom up your thread and let the people you're chatting with know that you've seen their message. It's an honest to god lifesaver.

If you're not exactly sure how to use iMessage reactions, this handy Medium post can clear a few things up for you.

Don't be weird about other people's phones

If you're in a group thread with people you know don't have the same phone or texting capabilities as you do, don't be a jerk about it. In fact, don't mention it at all. It's immaterial and makes you seem like a total dick.

Don't point out a lack of activity

Nothing is more grating than receiving a text that says little more than, "Hi," or asks, "Is anyone else still in here?"

Don't remind people you're in the group text just because there's been a lack of activity. Literally no one cares. Just appreciate that sweet, sweet silence, my friend.

If you're leaving the thread, let people know

If you must go — just as you would at a party, alert the people in your group thread that you will no longer be a member of said texting thread. You can give a brief explanation, and then feel free to remove yourself, but to just bounce without saying anything is a tad rude.


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